The Case of the Missing Rolls

My Saturday morning started out as every other Saturday morning. There were some new twists of course, my daughter is headed back off to college for one thing, and my friend Gaylon is running for County Judge. But other than that, it was a typical Saturday morning.

At my usual time I went looking for a snack which is made up of two Hawaiian sweet rolls, cheese, and some ham. I was thinking to myself as I walked to the kitchen how good this was going to be, it has to be my favorite snack of all time. Yet as I got to the kitchen and started to prepare my snack to my surprise my ROLLS were missing. I was in a state of panic as you might imagine. I looked in all the places rolls might hide, but to my chagrin they could not be located. Now at this time I am truly scared for their safety.

After looking everywhere in my house I am starting to go into panic mode. My first thoughts are that they had somehow gotten out of the house and are lost here in the big city of Boerne, or worse, the little rolls had been kidnapped by some diabolical fanatic who would not know what they had in their possession.

I immediately called the Boerne police to report them missing. After giving a lengthy description of the rolls to the police, they finally asked how long had they been missing? I replied that I had just found them missing a couple of hours ago. They replied they could not do anything at this time. The police seemed not to be worried and even told me that the rolls would probably show up. The officer was friendly enough but after taking my statement he said that if they were still missing after 48 hours to call them and they would put out a missing rolls report at that time.

As you may have guessed this did not sit well with me, I was worried that something awful might happen to them. So I called my friend Jack who is a private investigator to see if he could help me locate my rolls. After telling Jack my story he too seemed not to be worried, but told me they would show up. I tried to impress on him the urgency of the problem but Jack would have none of it. He even implied that I might have eaten them and forgot. Really now, I am only 49 and I would remember such things!

At my wits end I finally decided that I needed to inform my wife of the tragic events of the morning. I had wanted to spare her the pain of learning that these special rolls were missing but she had to be informed of their missingness. As I sat Rhonda down to break the news to her she all but laughed in my face! How could she be so callus to their plight!

After laughing for about half an hour, and trying to keep her composure she gently told me how these rolls had been abducted. She had sent them with my daughter (as you might remember is on her way back to college) to eat as a snack. So the case of the missing rolls has been finally solved. They are now somewhere between Boerne and Longview.

I will think of them fondly and remember how good they might have tasted, but I have the satisfaction of knowing that they are in good hands now and are being loved...... PS, daughter...Is there anything else missing that I might want to know of?

Love,
Papi (alias Bluesman)