Software Woes - Wife 1.0

An Email from a frantic user to tech support!

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Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

Thanks,

A Troubled User.

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REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings on Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3.0 This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

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Smile it's Monday!

How Things Change

This weekend I really saw my little girl, not as I remembered but how she is today.

This is how I remembered her :P

I went to pick her up from college and wow, how things changed. She has grow up into a beautiful young lady :P

You will never realize the shock on my face when I thought where have the years gone! But our little ones grow up and we have to allow them to start making their own choices.

Just remember it is not always easy

Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it. — Proverbs 22:6

Great Country Song

I'm Gonna Miss Her

Well I love her
And I love to fish
I spend all day out on this lake
And hell is all I catch
Today she met me at the door
Said I would have to choose
If I hit that fishin hole today
She'd be packin all her things
And she'd be gone by noon

Chorus

Well I'm gonna miss her
When I get home
But right now I'm on the lake shore
And I'm sittin in the sun
I'm sure it'll hit me
When I walk through that door tonight
That I'm gonna miss her
Oh, lookie there, I've got a bite

Now there's a chance if I hurry
I could beg her to stay
But that water's right
And the weather's perfect
No tellin' what I might catch today

Chorus

Well I'm gonna miss her
When I get home
But right now I'm on the lake shore
And I'm sittin in the sun
I'm sure it'll hit me
When I walk through that door tonight
That I'm gonna miss her
Oh, lookie there, I've got a bite

Greyhounds 33 - Vikings 7

Well we have made history! The Boerne Greyhounds have made it past the second round. We will be playing next week for the final of Division I and if we progress beyond it we will be in the quarter finals for state! Go Greyhounds!

Friday Night Football - Round 2

Here in the state of Texas High School Football playoffs reigns supreme. Many will travel 100 + miles to watch their local teams play and I will be one of them. The mighty mighty Greyhounds are going into the second week of the playoffs we we face Austin Lanier. Should be a great game and hopefully the Greyhounds will win! All we can do is hope and be like the little train and keep in our minds, "I think we can...I think we can!"

GO GREYHOUNDS! GO GREYHOUNDS! GO GREYHOUNDS! GO GREYHOUNDS!

Sunday - Thoughts

I was pondering in my mind; "What is it that God wants from me, so I turned to the Psalms and was reading chapter 51 which was Davids prayer of repentence and came across verse 17, and I thought, that it! Thats what He wants "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and a contrite heart, O God, Thou wilt not despise."

Then I thought what kind of sacrifice does he want from me? Paul answered that in Romans 12:1-2 "1 I urge you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. 2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect."

In the end I thought ok......how do I perform this, then words of Christ came to my mind;

24 Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. 25 For whoever wishes to save his life shall lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake shall find it. 26 For what will a man be profited, if he gains the whole world, and forfeits his soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?" - Matthew 16:24-26